Comparison:Thief of Joy

It’s absolutely common in this technologically advanced world and society we live in to compare ourselves to others constantly. While we do this, we probably aren’t even aware of most of the times it happens. Although we are unaware we may be doing this it’s damaging us more than we can ever imagine. It’s filling our minds with self deprecating doubt of immense proportions. We see it when we go to the grocery store and see a well to do women with her Louis Vuitton handbag, and we think damn that must be nice. It probably cost almost as much as my car. Well I suck. Maybe it’s walking at the park and trying to take control back from your health and yet it’s a rather nice day you are wearing yoga pants. Oh look here comes the lady who always runs the whole tine, so effortlessly, with her short shorts on..I bet she is nice and cool. Must be nice. I couldn’t if I wanted to, I’d  just chafe. Those are obvious comparisons that probably hit us right in the gut and make us want to quit trying altogether. Now to make matters worse we have Instagram and Facebook, showing us all how inadequate our lives are compared to out so called friends. It’s constant comparisons. It comparing our material possessions against others, our selfies and family happy posed photos, our business and successes, income, lifestyles, and even our very own beliefs. We now have life long friends at each other’s throats and spreading hate like wildfire over politics and memes. We are all guilty of deleting someone because they had a different view of something. Is that fair? No I don’t think so, but we still can’t help it, we unfriend without hesitation. It seems as is in today’s world it is inevitable that we will compare ourselves against media, celebrity, and peers no matter what. It is human nature! Comparison will kill your happiness and bring you down to a dark place you don’t need to go, but there is hope! You must make a conscious effort to stop. I know this is harder than it sounds but if you want to be happy with your own life it is imperative. Just today I went and unfollowed a few business colleagues, not because I don’t like them, but because I am wasting my time with watching their successes and not paying attention to my own more times than I want to admit. They are woman that rock at what they do, but their journey just isn’t the same as mine, so it serves me no real purpose to scroll through and constantly watch their day to day affairs. In fact no one’s journey will be the same as yours as we are all blessed with individual paths. We all have something to offer and be proud of. Focusing on your own self will bring you the most joy out of life. That’s why authenticity is vitally important. We don’t want to portray a fake image that we lead perfect lives, because we don’t, and become a part for the problem. Someone’s else’s success does not equal your failure!            
                          “Comparison is an act of                                    violence against the self.”

                                      -Iyanla Vanzant

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